I Talk, You Listen.
Tuesday, December 07, 2004
so what have we learnt today?

i) you can practically travel round singapore in a day via mrt - if you're quick enough. but bring a book. turn heads by being studious even when you're not in your own country.

ii) bring along an umbrella. you won't look like a sissy at all. 70.5% of almost EVERYBODY does. remember to check your ancient umbrellas for holes. oh, holey nights.

iii) always walk on the left side; this is to ensure some impatient and extremely-NFS-oriented hooligans a smooth way to a car accident way up front.

iv) you will be amazed at how many angles of sight one can avoid while taking a 6pm train back home. best advice: look down and SMS your friends about it to avoid public embarassment.

v) remember, to own a car here is like a luxury. accidentally scratch one and you can get ready to be a fugitive around ASEAN countries.

vi) singaporians are very particular about status: go to the posh stores, grab a starbucks frappucino, walk with kweilows trailing behind you, in short - act snobbish. you'll fit right in.

vii) i have never seen so many freebies in one shopping centre in my life. now, times it by the row of stores on this and opposite sides of the road, times the numerous mrt stops and VIOLA! a big bag of goodies that can rival that of Santa Claus.

viii) everything costs so much less. comparatively. and clean. comparatively. and beautiful. comparatively. and curvy. comparatively. and yummy. exactly.

ix) uncle taxi driver looks like my sister's friend's dad. OMG.

x) freedom of speech ensures that mr. lee kuan yew gets his share of criticism. i passed by some i-forgot-how-i-ended-there shopping centre while this book was being publicized by some indian guy. i just walked away from the confusion.

xi) gimme the tickets, friggin' machine! bring lose cash. do not insert in the S50. win, lose or draw.

xii) "look, aunty, i'm not from around here too. so stop asking me where the jewellery shop is, kay?"

a big warm welcome to half life 2: deathmatch . see you back in the new trimester with it.
posted by onions at 02:24

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